Get Over It

Get over it. That’s what they say, isn’t it. When a relationship, or even a friendship ends, whenever you express a moment of sadness, anger, or any emotion at all, the advice everybody gives you is to just “move on and get over it”. But it’s really not that simple.

My relationship ended almost 2 months ago. That’s a long time. And it still hurts to this day. Obviously I’ve gotten used to it now, so it’s not as bad as it was at first, but the pain is still there. And I have a feeling that’s not going to change anytime soon. It’s the same with a friendship ending. Most normal people don’t go from speaking or seeing this one person all the time, to being absolutely fine with no contact at all. It’s hard, and to me, that just shows how much you loved and cared for that person. It shows that they were an important part of your life.

But when friends or family tell you to just “move on”… I’m not gonna lie, that really just pisses me off. Do they really think I’m heartless enough to just not care about that person anymore? I’m quite an emotional person anyway, so if someone comes into my life and makes a big impact on it, I attach myself to them in a big way. I open up to them more than I would anyone else, and it makes me more vulnerable from it.

I recently started talking to my ex again, and even though I’m really glad we can still talk like we did before we were together, there’s still that part of me that wishes we could go back to a couple of months ago. Friends have told me that it’ll be harder to get over him if I keep talking to him like this, but really, I don’t think it’s gonna make much difference. It’s going to be hard regardless, at least now I don’t have that voice in the back of my head screaming that I wish he’d just talk to me.

My inspiration for this post was from Debi. She writes a “Thought of the Day” each Tuesday, and this week’s included a quote from Dr. Seuss.

 It got me thinking that yes, I am still gutted that our relationship didn’t work, but the reality is, it wouldn’t be good for either of us to go back to how we were. But at least I’ll always have the memories of the good times we had, and how when we were happy, we really were happy. And I’m content with the fact that we can at least still go back to being the good friends that we were before.

So if any of your friends or family is upset over losing someone close to them, don’t tell them to “get over it”. Support them, and show them that you’re there for them. Because with something like this, they just need to know that they have people who they can turn to.